Rite of passage

It's Mother's Day.  (was I supposed to capitalize that?)

I didn't get flowers, or a gift, or a card or have the troops rallied around me to shower me with kisses and praises.   I did however, get eggs benedict, made by the most fabulous husband in the world.  The kitchen and all its dirtiness was taken care of by that same fabulous husband and then we went to church.  

My mother's day actually started yesterday when we went on a impromptu trip to the next town over, then forgot the one reason why we went (we were supposed to exchange an item for his mother but left it at the house. hah).  We decided to stop and eat somewhere since it was close to dinner time.  Best decision ever.  D scanned through his phone and found a place that served gyros.  Some of our all time favorite food.  But it was closed.  Lucky for us, the town was small and all of the restaurants were on the same strip.  Even more lucky for us there was a little town fair in progress so we ambled through.  Cute.

Being the mother of these two little rascals has put me through the ringer.   Both of my children have distinctive personalities that try me in different ways.  I'm still alive.  My rite of passage was given and passed.  My children make me better.  I love them unconditionally.  Truly I do.  But I digress.

Back to the tiny little town: The food.  This is where the fun and memories started.  It made me anxious for my children to grow older so I could see how we would all interact.  It was just funny!  Poor D was suffering miserably from allergies so our whole meal was punctuated with his sneezes and "excuse me"'s from the table as he ran to blow his nose.  Thank God he didn't stuff tissue up his nose...but I know he was close to it.  

The kids were in their regular form, a little cagey and disappearing at odd moments.  More than once that evening I found Roma down by my feet and Cylas peering over the booth to spy on the other patrons.  

Everything was funny to us.  But the ultimate was when D asked for a box to take our food.  And then told the busboy that it was for our chickens.  I was mortified.  Really?  The kid just stared at us hoping we were joking then smirked.   When he left, we both bust out laughing.

Danville will never be the same.  

The Kelbas came and left their silly little mark in the minds of those surrounding them that evening.  I'm just glad I'm a Kelba.

Conscious Decisions

Irritated. 
It's no secret that I have had a hard time adjusting to living here...but I'd like to think that I'm living a pretty motivated lifestyle, to say the least.  Since we moved here, a little over three years ago, I have checked off more than half of my "I am going to do this before we leave" list.  That's a lot to be proud of.  But it seems like people hang on to the fact that I don't care to live here.  There is a multitude of reasons I could give as to why, but that is neither here nor there.  Frankly, I just want people to STOP caring about my preference and enjoy being my friend instead.  

There was a conscious decision made, on my part, to support my husband in this move out here so he could get an education.  I know this.  Please don't act like I'm the ONLY person on planet earth who has made a decision and had to find a way to live around the "uncomfortable" parts.  I've not been a complete saint and kept my grumblings to myself, but I eventually learned to turn my frustration into motivation.  Thank God, because I was driving myself nuts!

Bottom line, I am VERY thankful we moved here because I have learned so much about myself, good bad and the ugly :/ , grown stronger through trials, gained irreplaceable knowledge and created friendships with precious people.

Just asking people to forgive the fact that I'm a die-hard for California.  If you dare to ask, I will tell you where my heart is...but don't hold it against me.

My competition

I've decided that I'm officially, seriously, nervous about Cylas going to school.  Watching other people's children and their behaviors makes my nerves jump.  A lot of them have horrible habits that are only fueled by our society. 

My job is to put as much as I can into my boy before he leaves my four walls to sit next to children who might have a bad home life, teachers who are hell-bent on stuffing non-truths and sick ideologies into his innocent head.  

They are my competition.  They will have my kids for hours and hours at a time.  The "real-world" pulls no punches, they cock back and let it fly.  So that means I have to too.  My philosophy has never been to use God a a batter ram, but to show my child all of the wonderful things in God.  

If Cy is mean to his sister I don't ever say, "God doesn't like that."  I don't want him to fear God, well, not like that at least.  But I want him to understand His goodness.  

I explain God a lot differently than most.  Here is a perfect instance:  some days we talk about sharing with others, how it "makes your heart feel good" and how when "you do good, others want to do good, too."  It's very simple.
God isn't my go-to beating stick, he is the icing on the cake.  And that's what I want Cylas to see.  God isn't this big bad, bearded creature dude sitting up there with lightening bolts, no, he is our compass, the little censor light that blinks on and off to tell us when we're not doing the right thing.  And if I can equip my kid with this knowledge, he will be just fine.  His "God light" will shine brightly and guide him through the day and each situation.  Then, he'll come home and we'll discuss any thing that troubled him.  

I admit, my approach to God and parenting may be a little different than most, but I've seen what God becomes if he is presented in a certain form.  

People can yell and shout at me, but I really don't care.  God is the ONLY one who can protect my child from what this world is offering.

Mommy Hobbies: Butterfly Pendant Giveaway!!

Mommy Hobbies: Butterfly Pendant Giveaway!!: "I really, really like spring. It never really meant that much to me, being from California, because our 'spring' is only two weeks lon..."

Streeeecchhh

Warning:  Personal...but, this is my journal of sorts...

I'm sure you all can guess what that sound is, right?  Yeah, that's my kindness muscle.  For the most part I'm a pretty good person...well, I thought I was until someone called me names.  

They hurt really, really bad and I still think about them.  It happened three months ago and every day since then I have worked on myself to prove that person wrong.  I am NOT selfish, insensitive or self-centered.  It's all that runs through my mind these days.  

Amazing how one person's words can have such a deep affect.  In everything I do, I contemplate my motives and it doesn't matter..."you're selfish and self-centered" keeps ringing through my mind.  Torrrtuurrous.  Uhg.  Feels like I've been hit in the head with a gong and there is a constant ringing in my noggin. 

Tonight I'm going over to a woman's house, who I met through my photography business, to give her some spaghetti.  She injured her back and hasn't been able to move.  She has two children and usually works a full time job.  Stressful.

You would think that the thought of giving to someone in need would brighten my mental storm, but it's not.  I can't do enough good to erase those words.  These past few months I have stepped outside my "comfort zone" more than ever.  It's fun, and scary, worth it, but those words don't stop.

I sort of feel like crying as I type this because...wow, words DO hurt.  Silly, silly and foolish was the person who said, "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me".  Some things just don't heal...ever.

So, if you have a cross word with someone, measure them carefully before you spill it.  You don't know how deep those words will plunge or what affect they will have...I'm strong and I will get through it, but for now, it hurts and it's really, really hard.  Sometimes, I wish I could go back and change that day in my life...maybe.  Maybe not, because it's what gave me the nudge I needed to give of myself more.

So, maybe I should thank this person instead.  I will never say cruel harsh words to another person, especially my children.  One can only imagine what it would do to an innocent mind.  It's ok to tell someone how you feel, but think first...

Thank you.

Family Ties That Blind

**Fair warning, opinionated post**

Yes, blind.  It's not an uncommon occurrence and it happens more often than it should.  It seems that when there is a blood tie there is this special pass given out for making horrible mistakes or decisions and there is no worry of having to be held accountable.  Can I say the "H" word, please?  Pleeeease? 

Ok, I won't say it, I'll just spell it out.  I H.A.T.E that.  (there are certain things that are ok to hate, I promise, and this is one of them)

My family will tell you, my sisters, mom and brother, that I don't give out those "passes" in my family, not for them, not for my own children.  What an unfortunate example of enabling.  How is the individual ever to learn proper behavior, respect, responsibility if they're always given a way out of their messes.  Denial is not your friend.  It's your enemy and the sneakiest of rascals.  It will creep in and before you know it will have wound its slimy little tentacles around your eyes -- blinding you.  It's a horrible, horrible thing to be an accomplice to someone's stupidity and stand proudly by their side.  No one is capable of making the right decision all the time, but you could make BETTER ones.

Please, stop allowing your blood ties to blind.  It just makes you a sucker.  And please, if you're in a situation and people are trying to tell you you're giving out that "pass" -- LISTEN!!  It's ok to be wrong.  Just stop.  That person is probably killing you and you don't even know it.  They for sure don't respect you because you let what they do slide by, time and time again.  They know they have a shmuck in you.  *sung to the "You have a Friend in Me" tune*

Gracious.  I haven't written in like a month and this is what I decide to post.  It's been burning in my mind for quite some time.  Ahh, I love getting things like that off my chest.

My OTHER blog

Sorry, it's sort of taking over my life!  I have a total of three blogs and this is the one that suffers.  As soon as I can, I'm going to do a blog overhaul and make a combo blog so you only have to go to ONE of my three and then you can coast around there to read about my thoughts or my hobbies, or my kids!

This is a post, however, to let you all know about a giveaway that I'm doing on my hobby blog.

It's for a sock monkey.  Crazy busy as I am, I want to sew yet another sock monkey and then give it away!  So, please, click the link and let me know if you'd be interested in winning it.  Tell your friends because the more people who let me know of their interest the better.  

Don't be shy :))

Click HERE and join the fun!